Ok, I know, I know, relationships are anything but easy. But how hard is too hard? I'm a Taurus and my partner is an Aries. A bull and a ram. Earth and Fire. Bound to be a challenge, for sure. The love and romance is so intensely beautiful and wonderful, but it sits on the edge of a blade at all times.
We nearly break up once a week. It's ridiculous. Every time we fight, I think, "Why!? Why am I still choosing this?!". And then we make up and I remember. Our relationship is like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. Back and forth we go again and again.
But we are definitely learning from each other. Things are getting better all the time, and we are learning to navigate the complications of different communication styles. I thought that being single for five years helped me to evolve and learn about myself enough to know how to be with another person successfully. But for someone who claims to be a communication expert, I am truly being challenged in ways I never could have imagined. And what did I used to say to my students in yoga class?
If it doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you.
Everyday I am challenged to practice what I preach, and to be a better human being. And if that's not an empowering love, I don't know what is.
I have this theory; most long term relationships start out great and eventually over time things deteriorate and become really hard. Well this one started out really hard, so perhaps we will get all the good lessons out of the way nice and early, so that we can figure out how to be happy together in the long term.
We're putting the theory to the test, with a fake marriage. Breaking up is off the table until the end of the year. We force ourselves to deal with the issue, instead of threatening to run away all the time. Running away is easy. Loving and living with another human being who challenges you and takes you out of your comfort zone is hard.
I'm a Bikram yoga teacher, I like things to be hard =)